Enneagram Pairing Type 1 & 7
1 - The Moralist
Quality Control Specialist, Reformer, Perfectionist, Judge, Administrator, Rule Keeper, Crusader
7 - The Entertaining Optimist
Epicure, Visionary, Enthusiast, Jack-of-All-Trades, Adventurer, Innovator, Dilettante
Ones are part of the Gut triad. They are rational, moral, conscientious and detail-oriented. Sevens, part of the Head Triad, are mental, sharp, bright, optimistic, and inventive.
Generally, Ones want a logical, linear plan and Sevens want multi-optional, flexible plans. Sevens want to be the inventors and planners, Ones want to provide control over the structure and implementation.
Although they have diametrically opposed means of achieving their goals and attaining what they want from life, these two often have a profound idealism, love of humanity, and desire to make a positive impact in common. Both can be motivated by a sense of purpose, and their purposes are typically to benefit the world in some way. They also both appreciate the value of good planning, and have a keen mind for initiating projects, visioning the future, and laying out next steps (this being said, Ones possess infinitely more follow through than Sevens).
How You Complement Each Other
Ones and Sevens complement each other through their very differing strengths. Ones bring order, a strong work ethic, attention to detail, and a focus on high standards and maintaining excellence. Sevens bring enthusiasm, positivity, curiosity, spontaneity, playfulness, and an emphasis on keeping things moving when obstacles arise, including when Ones get stuck in their perfectionism.
Both types are future-focused, take the initiative and are idealistic, although Ones prefer to lock plans down and Sevens prefer flexibility. Ones’ diligent and consistent nature helps keep Sevens on track. Sevens are great fire-starters, and Ones are great at organizing and structuring the productive chaos Sevens create, making sure ideas are followed through to completion.
Ones work best with Sevens when the Seven is the inventor, and the networker and the One provides the structure, control, and follow-through. Ones can appreciate Sevens optimism, enthusiasm, flexibility, foresight and playfulness. Sevens can appreciate One's high ethical standards, improvement mindset, diligence, self-discipline, practicality, and attention to detail.
Furthermore, Sevens can teach Ones how to lighten up and view life as a source of pleasure instead of a duty to be managed. Their playfulness can lighten the load Ones tend to carry in their journey through life. Ones can give Sevens a grounded and rigorous set of principles to guide their growth and visions.
Ones stabilize Sevens energy and focus, which can at times be erratic. This can be a very fulfilling pairing if they establish a deep sense of alignment and learn, accept and absorb each other’s differing approaches to life.
How You Can Get Into Trouble
While Ones and Sevens complementariness are as a direct result of their differences, those very same differences can be the source of much difficulty if the negatives aspects are at all highlighted. When Ones feel stressed, they become critical, judgmental, inflexible, and sure that their perspective is correct. This can seriously bother Sevens who place a high value on openness, possibility, and exploration.
When Sevens feel their energy being shut down, they are a serious flight risk and tend to withdraw from the relationship or will find a way around the Ones imposed restrictions, usually through acts of rebellion. Ones see Sevens as undisciplined, irresponsible, inefficient, inconsiderate, egotistical and immature. They see Sevens as people who overpromise and underdeliver.
Often Ones can believe that Sevens act this way not because it is in their nature but because they are just trying to piss them off passive-aggressively. Conversely, Sevens can see Ones as overly stilted, rigid and negative. They can even go so far as to look down on them for being small-minded, stuck in their ways, and petty.
Additionally, Ones and Sevens often get into conflict around the allocation of resources. Ones can be frugal penny pinchers, whereas Sevens like to take significant risks as they strive towards their goals — much of which Ones see as extravagant indulgences. When Sevens are stressed, they can rebel against those imposing restraints on them in explosive outbursts.
They may also be generally pushy and demanding. Ones can find this embarrassing to be around, which can lead them to become more and more vocal with their criticism. When this doesn’t work to change Seven’s behavior, Ones will probably quietly give up, and the relationship will fizzle with no resolution or confrontation.
What Each Type Needs To Be Aware Of
Ones need to be mindful of their difficulty getting in touch with their light-hearted side, their tendency to judge Sevens' playful side and how they can inflexibly hold a self-righteous position with little room for the perspective of others. Conversely, Sevens need to be aware they do not ignore Ones’ legitimate concerns. They also need to recognize their inherent resistance to any limitations, which can manifest as avoidance of basic or mundane tasks, self-centeredness, and impulsivity.
In a professional environment, Ones should try to establish clear expectations with measurable results for Sevens. Sevens become evasive and make excuses if their mistakes are pointed out, so evaluate them more by their results. Sevens will be expecting opportunities to innovate and invent and can become very frustrated with a boring, repetitive routine.
How You Can Support One Another
Sevens are the perfect type to help Ones lighten up and have some fun. If Ones can do this, while becoming more flexible and letting go of some their judgmental attitude, this relationship has a great chance of thriving. Ones can support Sevens by helping them become more grounded in the present, the current task at hand, and releasing their fear of missing out.
If Sevens can get to a place where they can welcome even negative feedback, that will go along way to improving their relationship with Ones. Sevens can also emphasize attending to the needs of Ones, to ensure they feel valued, which is not an area in which Seven excel.
Indeed, their behavior often signals the opposite message, as they tend to become wrapped up their world of visions, plans, ideas, and fun new activities. Ones will do well to set reasonable and clear deadlines for Sevens since follow-through is not their strong suit.
On that note, Sevens work best when they participate in creating agreements since they like to feel equal in authority. Because Sevens tend to focus their attention on what they find most appealing, they need clearly defined expectations and deadlines for all tasks. Conversely, Ones do best in an environment in which they know their status, receive frequent and informal feedback and are armed with all of the information they need to ensure they can do an excellent job.
Ones can draw out Sevens' innovative ideas by staying open to a flexible structure. Sevens need to provide clear directions to Ones; otherwise, Ones may tend to feel anxious about any disorder and lack of structure, which may lead to resentment about poor management.
In A Romantic Context
Like anything comprised of complete opposites, this relationship can foster impressive growth through complementarity, challenge, and the sense of being able to rely on the other to make up any personal slack, or it can quickly escalate into a spiral of never-ending judgment and conflict. When in health, it is the very fact that they are so different that draws these two to each other. Ones’ orderliness, a sense of purpose, and a sense of pleasure in discipline both intrigues and teaches Sevens.
Conversely, Sevens’ whimsy, easy enjoyment, and sense of possibility opens up psychological and actual doors for Ones. These two share their idealism and future-orientation, and if they are both working toward some fundamental shared goal, will have a supportive, inspired relationship. Ones bring a grounded, steady consistency, which helps Seven to stay focused and on task, while Sevens bring a spontaneous, playful flow that can inspire Ones to loosen up and relax.
The relationship can stretch and stimulate both parties, leading to expansion and growth. However, it can just as easily backfire. Ones can see Sevens as flighty, undisciplined, reckless, and childish, while Sevens interpret Ones’ ways as inflexible, dogmatic, unnecessarily confining, and harsh.
With their inability to enjoy life, Ones tend to misunderstand the mission of most Sevens, namely to suck the marrow out of as many experiences as possible. Sevens, on the other hand, cannot understand why Ones refuse to let go of their rules and kick back. In Sevens’ eyes, Ones are uptight, prudish, and perfectionist, while Ones can only see Sevens as scattered liabilities.
A cycle of criticism, blame, rules (Ones), and rebellion (Sevens) ensues. Sevens feel their partner is the cause of their unhappiness, and in the way they do, start looking for good feelings elsewhere—whether it’s a solo trip, a private hobby, a new friend group, or a new love interest. Ones’ abandonment wire can be tripped.
When in their low functioning states, Sevens can become pushy and demanding, which Ones find incredibly embarrassing. Ones, by contrast, become demeaning and hypercritical. Both people will likely retreat into depression and contempt, which hinders any chance of reconciliation until one person or another puts the final nail in the coffin with some emotionally charged blow.