Enneagram Type 4 - The Romantic Individualist

Individualist, Tragic-Romantic, Connoisseur, Humanitarian, Aesthetic Person, One-of-a-kind, Dramatic King or Queen


Worldview of the Type 4


Overview

You are a deep, intuitive, self-aware person who strives to be unique and individualistic. Your passionate nature, incredible sensitivity, vision and emotional intelligence affords you the ability to see things in an entirely original way which is inspiring to others.

You have an aesthetic sensibility with a flair for the dramatic and you like to put your personal mark on things. Emotionally expressive, you notice what is missing and may at times feel swept away by intense feelings. Your keys to growth include realizing that everyone is equally unique and important, and finding emotional balance in the present moment.


What You Are Great At

  • Being passionate and romantic.

  • Maintaining an idealistic vision even in mundane realities.

  • Self-searching honesty with a willingness to look within.

  • Being emotionally deep and authentic.

  • Being creative, artistic and expressive with an eye for aesthetics and beauty.

  • Inspiring, moving, and uplifting others especially when they are suffering.

  • Being comfortable with all human emotions (even “darker” emotions).

  • Being compassionate, empathic and supportive to others.

  • Seeing what is missing and finding a unique way of addressing it.

  • Being open to the deeper truth or wisdom below the surface.

  • Enduring suffering and seeing its transformative value for inner growth.

  • Valuing and prioritizing deep connection with others.


Core Wiring

You want to be inspired, intuitive, and unique; but most importantly, you want to be passionate, true to your feelings, and authentic. You see yourself as a sensitive intellectual. That is, you see yourself as creative, expressive, and spiritual.

You are identified with your emotional states and their meaning. You see yourself as emotionally deep, and seek beauty and meaning in everything you do. You may envy others, however, and become moody, haughty or overly emotional under stress. At your best, you are emotionally self-aware, self-revealing, creative, extremely compassionate, and humane.


What Drives You

Feeling a deep sense of loss, and longing for what seems to be missing, can create the need for intensity and originality to fill the void. You try to be special and original, having a unique and distinct identity to manage feeling of rejection.

You are driven to avoid abandonment and don’t want to be seen as ordinary or shallow. You want to connect with your deepest emotions; express your passion and authentic individuality; understand and be understood; and create a world of beauty.


Inner World of the Type 4


Core Fears

Your core fear of being rejected may be expressed as fears of having no identity or personal significance, striving for individuality, or chronic frustration. You may fear anything that would confirm your feelings of unworthiness, such as being made wrong, seen as defective or flawed, or told that you are too sensitive or emotional.

Despite longing for deep connection, you fear alienating others with chronic woes or emotional reasoning. You may then fear actually opening up to others and experiencing the pain of losing again.


Core Desires

To be authentic, singular, unique, and exceptional, as well as to have deep emotional connections.


Core Needs

You need to be seen as artistic, gifted, and accomplished. You focus on your individuality and on carving a distinct image of yourself.

You need to express your deep feelings and want others to validate your emotions. Whether arranging your living space to reflect your refined tastes or engaging in an artistic pursuit, it is essential for your sense of well-being to express your creativity.


Core Beliefs

Something is important is missing. Knowing my uniqueness and expressing my depth is essential to finding my authentic self and meaning in life.


Likes

  • Being validated for your emotional intelligence.

  • Being seen as singular, special or unique.

  • Feeling emotions deeply or intensely.

  • Feeling connected with others.

  • Receiving praise, recognition, and accolades for your originality.

  • Being “the one” and being in the “inner circle”.

  • Feeling love, approval, acceptance.

  • Having a special place next to the most valued or important person.

  • Making a unique contribution or being distinguished in your field.

  • Having your opinions be heard and well-received.

  • Being adored, valued, and treated as important.

  • Finding what is original and giving meaning to suffering.


Dislikes

  • Being seen as ordinary or “one of the crowd”.

  • You dislike censorship, uniformity and regulation.

  • Feeling shame and being disconnected from others.

  • Receiving criticism or blame.

  • Being painfully self-conscious.

  • Being rejected if you display your deeper emotions.

  • Being made wrong or invalidated.

  • Having mundane tasks to complete that seem meaningless.

  • Being seen as inadequate, common or irrelevant.

  • Watching someone else get promoted or recognized.

  • Being told what to do.

  • Feeling that your voice isn’t heard - not being listened to.


Outer World of the Type 4


Strategies

You look inward and focus on self-discovery to find meaning, as well as to understand yourself and others. You go into your emotional depths and seek happiness through beauty, suffering, and nostalgia.


Impact of Strategies

You are seen as singularly unique, and are emotionally understood and accepted for who you authentically are.


What's Great About You

You are passionate, deep, emotionally authentic, creative, fiery, and expressive. You are a true humanitarian and offer compassion to others.


Attention goes to...

Your attention goes to searching for meaning, noticing what is missing, feelings of melancholy and nostalgia, and longing for the unavailable. You appreciate the special, the humane and the beautiful.

You like to put your personal signature on everything that you do. Your refined tastes make you a great critic and someone who appreciates the truly exceptional.


Operating System of the Type 4


At Your Best

You are an impassioned, sensitive, self-revealing, and original seeker, who focuses on what is different and unique in any given situation. You love life’s mysteries and have a rich inner life, recognizing that things are always deeper than they appear on the surface. You long to discover your true identity and feel called to quests for personal exploration.


You identify with your sense of humanity and find ways to give meaning to suffering. You value emotional authenticity (yours and others) and are not easily deterred by some of the “darker” aspects of the human experience, such as grief and shame. Your tendency to feel things fully and your openness to others’ emotional expression can make you a close friend and confidante.


You are naturally creative, with an eye for what is rare and exclusive, and love to create an atmosphere of beauty and romance around you, which can be uplifting and inspiring for others. Your people skills and sensitivity to the needs of others make you a valuable asset to your team in the areas of trust, authentic communication, continuous learning, and support.


Under Stress

When your focus is resolutely set on aesthetics and/or what is lacking or missing, you may develop a passion for “protest”, feel a sense of loss and disenchanted, and feel disconnected from others, or that people don’t understand you. Your need for ideal circumstances may cause you to become negative, dispirited and downtrodden. It may seem that what you have is ordinary or dull compared to th